Love in the 21st century appears in forms our predecessors probably did not imagine. Within the last ten years, social media has cultivated pop culture norms and our ideas surrounding dating in unimaginable ways. Trending topics draw us in and bring attention to matters that are important to our culture. Twitter has been able to lead the masses better on what is deemed acceptable and praiseworthy by maintaining that leverage over other sites like Facebook, Snapchat, and Instagram.

As a proud member of what has been coined “Black Twitter,” the topics of dating range from $200 dates, “pick me’s,” and the realm of avoiding hotep male opinions, which successfully aid in the almost weekly gender wars. Anything from women saying they do not date men who use Groupon, to men saying they hold one racial background as superior to another will spark an ultimate uproar on the timeline. Navigating the chaos can be complicated as you have to weed out the pure rubbish. Twitter is all laughs for most, but what individuals fail to realize is that these sudden topics and current events are setting expectations no matter how silly they are. It is an overload on perspectives; the good, the bad, and the ugly of people’s opinions on minuscule subjects like whether it is acceptable to serve your man food on a paper plate. 

Topics as such stem from the need for romance in our lives and in society. The need for a relationship or lack thereof for the younger generation and millennials creates this space for irrationality, because everything is based on preconceived notions on how things should be, outdated, and all. Think romance for a second: what it looks like, what it feels like, where it’s represented for Black people mainly. The most famous avenue to venture through for representation of love would be the media, which in a “Love & Hip Hop” world and less of a “Love Jones” world, it can leave most of us…lost. 

It literally goes down in the DM’s these days, a simple DM will lead you to your King or Queen. People are making lasting connections off of simply shooting their shot and it’s truly amazing to see. Rules on what’s acceptable when dating are ever-changing, as is evident in the common topics discussed. The newfound term “talking” has us entering unwarranted situationships that also expose the indiscretions in dating. We are guilty of setting extremely high expectations and listening to the influences on our timelines, rather than truly focusing on someone with no interruptions/temptations. Not to say this is all a bad thing, it also gives us a sense of community. It’ll be interesting to see the studies 20 years from now on the marriage patterns of millennials, standard dating norms and how most couples met.  Think for instance, how have you met the last few people you’ve tried to take out? Meeting online is our new standard. Go ahead and drop your number in their messages sis, what’s there to lose? 

By: Ciara Spruill

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